flicker on blink off
twilight bursts welcoming dusk
summer magic glows
I've been observing my evening visitors for about two weeks new they would become a haiku in no time at all. In making my list of words this week I did a quick definition search to make sure I understood twilight and dusk; making sure I used them in the correct order. I'm always focused on the syllable structure but find it interesting I brought in a little science order for my word placement. I went outside to take a picture tonight and observed in darkness; they disappear. I played around including this in the last line but wanted to capture I think fireflies are pure magic.
Thank you Diane at Random Noodling for hosting Poetry Friday this week.
Hi Mandy! I'm a strong advocate of less is more, so I'd recommend you not get hung up on "syllable structure." Go for the essence! 5-7-5 is not a necessity in English language haiku, only in classrooms.
ReplyDeleteInteresting about "twilight" and "dusk" -- I think I might have messed that up. Robyn also wrote about "glow bugs" today! The magic of fireflies seems to be dear to poets' hearts.
ReplyDeleteLove how you grabbed a little science in your writing and pointed it out to us. I've never wondered about the order of twilight and dusk, but now I know. And you're so right - fireflies are pure magic! I love it when we visit OK and KS in the summer and see them. We don't have them in Washington.
ReplyDeleteI always thought twilight was another word for dusk. And gloaming was the Scots version. I agree that fireflies are pure magic, uniting the elements, earth, water, fire and air.
ReplyDeletePoetry Friday has been graced with lots of fireflies over the last couple of weeks. I'm envious, and can't wait to see some. With much warmer weather arriving today, perhaps I'll be gifted a few "flickers" and "blinks." -- Christie @ https://wonderingandwondering.wordpress.com/
ReplyDeleteWe don't have fireflies in Colorado, our loss, but I grew up with them, and a fond memory is sitting on the porch at that elusive twilight to dusk time, awaiting that magic to rise up. Beautiful to read your haiku, Mandy, and the story!
ReplyDeletePure magic indeed, Mandy! Your lines are sweeping with those flickers and blinks-I love it!
ReplyDeleteMagical fireflies and poem! It's been fun to see how many firefly poems have been flickering through these posts.
ReplyDeleteI second what Diane said. After you've spent some time holding your feet to the fire of 5-7-5, it's a wonderful release to let go and aim for short, long, short...all the while focusing, as you do, on the essence of what it is you are noticing or thinking about.
ReplyDeleteLove the advice, Mary Lee.
DeleteMandy, fireflies are a favorite of mine. I remember when my children were young and used to run around the yard catching them. If you would like to pair your poem with an image, I would love to share it in my summer gallery (oops, but wait Springsations has to come first).
DeleteI've never seen a firefly, but I've been experiencing them vicariously through everyone's summer-inspired poetry!
ReplyDeleteLove this about fireflies, they are magical.
ReplyDelete